@Mira one of the things I admire about you is that you open up and let your feelings, raw as they may be, show; a lot of people bottle their feelings up and turn them inwards and end up being self destructive. The world is a strange, fascinating place and there are lots of things out there that can hurt us, but the one thing that hurts us most is ourselves. Sure there are people out there, sad people, who take delight in hurting others, but they are the ones to pity, because they are the unloveable, not you.
Finding someone to love you is not an easy task, but you need to put yourself out there so that someone can connect with you. I understand that it's difficult for you because your confidence has taken a beating. Go for baby steps, do a little something each day that takes you out of your sheltered environment and become a little bolder each day. Mixing with other people is important and there are people out there just like you who wonder if someone will love them; that someone could be you and they may just love you back for making the effort to be there for them to see.